Roof repair here at the castle has made the usually quiet days well, not. Its ok though, old castles have old roofs and when the shingles are starting to wear and curl, well its time to replace it. Its funny and weird to think that when it is time to replace the roof again I will either be really old or gone. Funny the thoughts you have sometimes.
This is Memorial Day weekend. To many it’s a three-day weekend and that is absolutely great. Many of us can use a break and spend time with our families. For some this is a reminder of those lost in the service of this country.
As a vet it does upset me when I see ads that tell you, “Remember what this weekend is really about.” Sometimes a celebration is a better way to show respect and honor someone and sometime so is being solemn. I know when I was in the Army, I certainly spent the weekend at the lake, or chilling the hell out. Its all about mental health.
Which is why it is important that when you emphasize remembrance many will remember the grieving and feelings after that person was killed. For vets many times this is a violent death that they have witnessed or comrades and friends that were killed. Either way it can be tough to deal with those emotions again, especially the trauma.
So… it is easy for folks to be depressed, anxious, hypervigilant, hypersensitive, guilty that they survived, or even suicidal. That’s why it is important to check in with each other not just this weekend but every weekend to make sure that things are still “OK.”
As a provider we use therapeutic communication as a means to discuss feels and desired outcome. It allows the provider to assist the patient in making healthy and sane choices in their life. You don’t have to go to that extreme of course, many times it just takes some good listening skills on your part. If you can’t listen at least take the time to help them find someone who can. Mental health, not porn, is a real public health crisis as well (I know there are a few, but we seriously neglect shit like this). The aim is that it helps folks not make it worse.
Worse means thoughts of self-harm or harming others. Often someone who is suicidal has the potential for both. Especially in a veteran population the desire may be to act out. If anyone wants to harm someone else, it is best to get immediate intervention (Call 911). While this may seem extreme, this situation may affect your immediate safety. For those that want to do self-harm, it is important to engage them and direct them to a helpful situation (sometimes that may also be calling 911, but sometimes you can help them find definitive help without involving emergency services. Some important signs to remember that may help you tell if someone is suicidal:
- Talking about wanting to die or to kill oneself;
- Looking for a way to kill oneself;
- Talking about feeling hopeless or having no purpose;
- Talking about feeling trapped or being in unbearable pain;
- Talking about being a burden to others;
- Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs;
- Acting anxious, agitated, or reckless;
- Sleeping too little or too much;
- Withdrawing or feeling isolated;
- Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge; and
- Displaying extreme mood swings.
Take this seriously, since you could be the last person they ever speak to. You can obviously get help through emergency services as well as calling one of these numbers (Stolen from Wikipedia).
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached at 1-800-273-8255
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (ESP) can be reached at 1-888-628-9454
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Deaf & Hard of Hearing Options) can be reached at 1-800-799-4889
The Veterans Crisis Line (https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/) is a 24-hour, toll-free hotline that provides phone, webchat, and text options available to military veterans and their families. It provides options for deaf and hard of hearing individuals. The Veterans Crisis Line can be reached at 1-800-273-8255, Press 1.
The Crisis Text Line (crisistextline.org) is the only 24/7, nationwide crisis-intervention text-message hotline. The Crisis Text Line can be reached by texting HOME to 741-741.
The Trevor Project (http://www.thetrevorproject.org/) is a nationwide organization that provides a 24-hour phone hotline, as well as limited-hour webchat and text options, for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth.
The TrevorLifeline can be reached at 1-866-488-7386.
TrevorChat can be found at https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help-now/ (available 7 days a week from 3PM to 10PM ET).
TrevorText can be reached by texting TREVOR to 1-202-304-1200 (available M-F from 3PM to 10PM ET).
The Trans Lifeline (https://www.translifeline.org/) is a nonprofit organization that is created by and for the transgender community, providing crisis intervention hotlines, staffed by transgender individuals, available in the United States and Canada.
The Trans Lifeline can be reached at 1-877-565-8860.
You can facilitate this call with them and help them reach out, even if they feel they can’t. Bottom line don’t leave that person until you can help them find help. It really is as serious as a heart attack.
Now that I have bummed you out, have a great weekend anyway. Enjoy each other and your mental health.