WELCOME TO THE COMMUNITY CENTER
“Because Belonging Should Be Simple™” ▌
STEP 1: STATE YOUR IDENTITY
Please clearly and accurately state your identity using the currently approved acronym.
Failure to include all applicable identifiers may result in:
- Immediate correction
- Passive-aggressive sighing
- Revocation of conversational privileges
Note: Acronym subject to change without notice.
STEP 2: PROVIDE SUPPORTING DOCUMENTATION
To ensure authenticity, please be prepared to:
- Explain your lived experience
- Cite personal history
- Pass the Informal Yet Deeply Judged Identity Verification Process™
STEP 3: COMPLETE THE QUEER PROFICIENCY EXAM
Questions may include:
- “When did you realize?”
- “Have you ever…?” (followed by something oddly specific)
- “But are you really…?”
Passing score: Undefined, but we’ll know it when we see it.
STEP 4: TERMINOLOGY COMPLIANCE CHECK
Before speaking, please ensure:
- All language is current (within the last 3–5 business days)
- No outdated terms are used
- No accidental omissions occur
Mistakes will be corrected immediately and, if necessary, publicly.
STEP 5: COMMUNITY INTEGRATION
Once approved, you may:
- Sit at the table
- Participate in discussions
- Experience mild, ongoing anxiety about future mistakes
IMPORTANT NOTICE
The Community Center prides itself on inclusivity.
Any behavior that makes others feel excluded will not be tolerated.
This includes—but is not limited to—
making honest mistakes, asking questions, or failing to perfectly navigate a constantly evolving system.
FINAL REMINDER
We are all here because we want to belong.
Please complete all required steps to prove that you do.
END OF TRANSMISSION ▌